Seriously, this is hilarious. I wish it was my blog.

http://catalogliving.net/

I am totally moving in with Gary and Elaine!!!

In other news, I got off my lazy ass and created a work blog (but I don't want to cross reference it because I don't think any of my clients need to know about my views on polygamy, marijuana laws, wine consumption or all about my thrift store addiction--- Not that any amateur sleuth or my creeper sister-in-law couldn't figure it out if they really wanted-- I just don't need to let it all hang out). I already have a website, but I thought I would go with a work blog as well. Keep me focused.  Actually that is what "LexLociLori" was supposed to be about-- local legal issues, but, uh-- that is not what happened. Ha! Sue me.


Speaking of thrift addictions, this is what happened to me yesterday at the FIRC.

I used to be embarrassed about how often I went and then I eventually surrendered to it and now I am treated like royalty and given unadvertised "discounts."

BTW, the FIRC is pronounced like one word-- (say "furk"). When I leave the house, Matt likes to say, "Just come straight back, no FIRCing around."


Well, when all was said and done, I had FIRCed up this mess.

 I just watched that TLC Sister Wives infomercial show, and I am sold. Sign me up. You truly can have it all--- if you have a couple of sister wives to help you take care of business.



Seriously, TLC has put together a pretty rosy picture of polygamy. There was not a prairie dress or child bride to be found.



The only thing I did not really care for was the douchy husband, Cody.

I think he is as smug and slimy as Bill Henrickson.


But Matt is so level-headed and sweet, I think we could make a go of it without him getting all big-headed or growing boy band hair.

So assuming Matt is game, I have picked out my sister wives:

1-- Lorelai Glimore.

I think we could have fun drinking over-sized mugs of coffee and making obscure pop-culture references while folding laundry. I hope she is still friends with Sookie (though I think that Sookie may have her very own show now-- so she may not have time to hang out with us).



2-- Kristin Wiig. She is just so damn funny and since we probably won't be able to afford to go out, we will need her around for some entertainment.



I promise I will only make her do that Lawrence Welk singing-sister act once a day. They did not really touch on it in the TLC show, but according to Big Love, the first wife is the Boss!

3-- and since we are going to be having a lot of fun, talking smack and laughing, we will probably need someone that can cook.

I thought about Paula Dean, but I don't think Matt would go for that.


I thought about Giada.


But then I got worried that she might be too sexy and stir up jealousy issues with me and Lorelai and Kristin. Besides, she strikes me as a Nicky-style trouble maker and honestly, who has time for that?




And Rachel Ray is out of the question for obvious reasons.
(That being that I want to punch her in the face every time that she opens her damn trap).


I just realized that celebrity chefs are all super annoying.

I am out of ideas. Any suggestions??? 

In all seriousness, if given the choice between the polygamist (Browns) and the quiverfull  (Duggars), I would go with the polygamists.

SATURDAY:

We took the dogs on the Salt Lick Trail in Eagle's Nest Wilderness area.

Georgous.

Do you remember those movies from the 70's where that family gets fed up with city life and moves to the middle of nowhere to get away from The Man and all his trappings?

Yeah,  I loved those movies and fantasized about living such a life.

I am making my dream a reality right?

HAHAHAHA!!

In reality, The Man won't let you enjoy the freakin wildnerness!!!

Here are some signs from our little outing.








The Man is even trying to keep the wildlife down.

LOL!  Keep it calm Mr. Moose. You best behave in the national wilderness. Who do you think you are?? Don''t you know about 36 CFR 261? Don't make me call The Man.

****************************************************


SUNDAY:

Fall rituals are in full swing:

Out come the pumpkins:




Semi-Homemade Green Chili.


Semi-round tortillas.

Let me just say that I have been very unbloggy lately. That is in both writing posts and reading other blogs. I have the fuck-its. I also have a potty finger-- Okay that sounded gross but that was supposed to mean potty mouth, but in the written form. That was stupid. What the hell?

Did you see in the news that Blockbuster filed bankruptcy yesterday? Big shocker. The writing was on the wall. I have not been to a BB for at least 4 years. I think the last movie I rented was Napoleon Dynamite. I take that back. I actually bought the Napoleon Dynamite DVD there and that was the last time I set foot in a Blockbuster (though there is one just down the street). I think I the only reason that I went there was because someone had given Chase a Blockbuster gift card for Christmas.

Funny story. Did you know I grew up in Dallas? We lived about a mile from the original Blockbuster (which opened when I was in high school). It seemed like in one year's time they were EVERYWHERE!! I am not saying that I gave them their start, but I am pretty sure that they failed without me.


Allow me to explain.  I moved back to Dallas in 1999 to work as an attorney in the telecom industry. This was the time when they were giving away crazy stock options, IPOs were happening by the minute and the economy was just swell. The telcom company that  I worked for was bought out within one year --and the new corp. canned the entire legal department. After that shitfest, I went on an interview with Blockbuster (HQ in downtown Dallas) for an in-house attorney position. Things were going GREAT and I had interviewed with several big-wigs at the company. Finally as things were wrapping up, I was asked the "do you have any questions" question. I asked if I got the job, would they consider forgiving my enormous late fee debt?? THAT WAS NOT WELL RECEIVED!!! I should have just said I was a spy from Hollywood Video. I was told that they were "extended viewing fees and other bullshit, bullshit, bullshit." HAHAAHA!! I did not get that job.

I am sure I could have saved them if I would have landed a job there: )They just did not want to hear the TRUTH!

My other brush with a big business taking off from my neighborhood was with Chipotle. When I first got out of law school, we moved down the street from the original Chipotle in Denver. It was the only Chipotle at the time and like Blockbuster, it suddenly just exploded.


I still love Chipotle (and it really hasn't changed much from its original restaurant) even though I think they are now owned by the evil McDonalds conglomerate.


- Chicken

non-cilantro rice (HATE soapcilantro) You can totally order without cilantro. They keep it in back.
pinto beans (gross to the black beans, this is America, not the Caribbean, I like my Mexican, Mexican style)
hottest sauce
corn sauce (though there is some cilantro in there which is OK as long as it does not get on my tongue)
cheese
a tiny bit of sour cream
chips to scoop up the droppings

TOTALLY WORTH THE 1,000+++++ calories, dontcha think?

Have a great weekend.

I know I am a little late on this one, but I made grilled pizza for the first time on Sunday. I make my own pizza all the time, but had never tried it out on the grill so I thought I would give it a whirl while we watched the Bronco's game.

I used my normal pizza crust recipe, but added one extra tablespoon of olive oil so it would not stick to the grill. I also kneaded it for 10 minutes, divided it and let it rise for one hour.

I was not planning on blogging about it, but Matt was taking pictures, so why not homes?

First, I got the grill hot (500 degrees) then I put the dough on the grill and let it puff up. I then took it off, flipped it over and added my toppings (Canadian bacon, red onions and peppers which I grilled on tin foil while I waiting for the grill to get super hot).



I then added fresh mozzarella and put the pizzas back on the grill.


It seriously took just a few short minutes and they were ready.



Matt  loooovvvveeed the crust.  Crispy and delicious.

Speaking of bandwagons, a few years ago the Rockies were in the division playoffs and Chase got us tickets to one of the games. Of course, I really had not been watching all year, but with Rockies potentially going to the World Series, I decided I needed to go all out in my support. So we went shopping.

And I wanted to buy some boots like these to wear to the game:

Matt's response:  "Lori, if you are going to jump on the bandwagon, you should do so subtly."

Whateva!!! 

BTW, the Rockies are looking pretty damn good late in the season.

Do you think I can pull this look off?

 Just a thought.

Yesterday we decided to spend the last Saturday of summer fishing.

Matt calls me the "fishin' magician" because I always seem to have such good luck. Of course he has to do all the dirty work, i.e. carrying the cooler, getting my pole ready, getting my line untangled, avoiding my wild casts (that may or mat not cause him bodily injury), getting my fish off the hook, stringing the fish, gutting the fish and fetching me beers. He really does not have time to catch any himself.

The weather was perfect-- so it wast fun just hanging outside with our dogs even though we spent hours before we even got a nibble.

In fact, it was so warm that all creatures (big and small) needed to cool their tootsies.


Callie thought that a swim was in order.


Matt's only luck was catching Coor's Light cans.


I wasn't giving up though.


After all, I was wearing my lucky fishing hat.


The day was clear and we had perfect views of North Peak at Keystone.

Soon enough there will be snow and skiers on those runs.


Callie look liked she wanted to soak up as much summer as possible before the snow flies.



Finally, a fish!!

So my angling Sherpa got to work.

Murphy supervised, of course.


 It was almost sunset.

Time to go home.

What was on the dinner menu?

Fresh rainbow trout, of course.




THE END.